3.501: Under a Strange Sky

Synopsis

Keeper of the Ways begins here, a new six-episode campaign that slots in between the end of The Fall of New Jerusalem and the start of Radio Man. It is a D&D 5e game rather than Call of Cthulhu, run with Sandy Petersen's Cthulhu Mythos for 5e, which adds mythos races such as the ghoul as playable characters, a new Yog-Sothothery skill for making sense of cosmic weirdness, and rules for dread. Alex Morrison is the DM and also voices Sheriff Terrick Cobb. Before play begins, he walks the table through the main differences from Call of Cthulhu: everything runs off the d20 and a modifier against a difficulty or armor class instead of rolling under a skill, the game is heroic fantasy rather than survival horror, characters have special abilities to remember, and good roleplaying earns inspiration, which he hands out as golden d20s. The players are Donovan Bollard as Drandy Savage, Seth Morrison as Tim, Peter Morrison as Glenn Ghoulia, Sam Morrison as Major Baker's Cat and Abel Morrison as Mathon.

After a long monologue about the weight of responsibility and the question of whether we are our brother's keeper, the story opens in blackness. The characters find themselves in an unknown place of enormous geometric structures reaching up into a strangely colored sky, as something gigantic passes far overhead with a distant roar. Then their eyes open on a normal sky, and each of them is lying on the ground in a burned and scorched clearing at the top of a wooded hill, with their feet pointing toward each other in a circle. Only the cat is on its feet, though it too is out cold. Everyone is hazy, still carrying flashes of the strange place, and remembers little more than a name.

Donovan first announces himself as "Dragon Bee Daddy" before remembering that his name is Drandy Savage, a black dragonborn paladin with a shield, a red cape, boots and a holy symbol around his neck. Tim is tall, with thick black hair and a long black cloak. He has the vague sense that he has sent many souls out of the world and that he is "one with the darkness." Glenn Ghoulia is a ghoul in a fitted suit and paisley ascot, with a loot case beside him. Mathon is a hulking bugbear in chainmail with a face more like a Bigfoot than a bear. Major Baker's Cat is a medium-sized cat of many colors who is startled to discover that he can talk and think clearly. When they introduce themselves, Glenn announces that he is a ghoul, and the cat claims to be a major in the feline battalion of Uranus.

Behind them stands a single black standing stone, polished on its front face to a blurry, mirror-like sheen. Looking at it fills the group with dread, and under the Cthulhu Mythos rules they have two levels of it at once. All of them fail the Wisdom saving throw and cannot bring themselves to move closer, and they take disadvantage on ability checks while it is in view. The cat licks himself instead of noticing anything. The rest see that it is overcast and starting to sprinkle, and that a village lies at the foot of the hill, hours away. Nobody can learn anything more about the pillar, though someone thinks it looks like a portal, and Tim says it gives him the willies and that they had better jog on. The group makes its way down the wooded hill with a successful survival check, and the dread fades with distance.

Evanstone is a small village of mostly stone buildings with wood and thatch, with a walled stone manor near the center that is clearly more important than anything else around it. As the party passes the outlying farms, hardly anyone is out working the fields, and the few people they see duck back inside as they approach. Drandy uses his Divine Sense and at first seems to pick up an undead presence traveling with the group, which he assumes is Glenn, but the table points out that a playable ghoul is a living creature and the DM rules that Drandy senses nothing. In town an old woman takes one look at the group and flees. They realize that a bugbear is an alarming sight, and Tim advises keeping to the shadows. It is coming into evening, and the group heads for the shops, hoping to find an inn or a pub.

The first person to approach them is a middle-aged man in armor with shoulder-length brown hair and a beard, a sword at his hip with his hand on the hilt and a scowl on his face. Major Baker's Cat breaks ranks and weaves figure eights around his legs, and a Persuasion roll of 15 calms the man down. He turns out to be Sheriff Terrick Cobb, head of the town watch. He tells them they have arrived in Evanstone, wonders aloud what on earth they are, and gives them the benefit of the doubt only because they travel with such a charming cat. He points them to the Stoneway Inn, two streets down and to the left, and explains that the manor is Ebengard Manor, home to Mayor Warder Ebengard, whose family has run the town for generations. The mayor is currently away on business, which makes Cobb the de facto head of the village.

When the group says that they woke by a giant black pillar on the hilltop, Cobb's face goes pale. He tells them they should leave, because Evanstone does not need any more trouble, and warns them that nobody there will welcome them. After the cat works on him with another Persuasion roll, he admits that people have gone missing and that the town has been under an air of bad luck for a long time. Nobody goes up to the hilltop, and some who do never come back. The last person to come down, a young boy about ten years ago, brought more bad luck, and he left town soon after. If they insist on staying, Cobb advises them to be indoors before sundown and not to come out again until sunrise. The group takes his advice and heads for the inn as the rain picks up and the townspeople rush indoors. In the market square they find a General Store and the Stoneway Inn, with its sign hanging out front, and the episode ends there.

Funny Moments

Asked for his name, Donovan declares himself "Dragon Bee Daddy, fire breather from the north." The DM says it makes it hard to keep a serious tone but agrees to call him "daddy" for short, before Drandy Savage finally "remembers" his real name.
The table keeps slipping into old characters' names. The DM calls Drandy's player "Dr. Simeon" out of habit, Tim is told he briefly thought his name was Tallahassee Turner, and Glenn is asked whether he is Dom Druncard and then called Dom when he asks about a pub. He insists, "I'm not Dom. My name is Glenn Ghoulia."
Drandy Savage describes himself as "a well-formed dragon" with "pecs like you had never seen before" and a "six pack of the gods", and says he is black as hell. He also notes that he has boots on: "You think a dragon can't wear boots? ... You think a cat can just wear boots? Nuh uh."
Someone points out that Drandy swears a lot for a paladin, and he tells them to mind their damn business.
Mathon's first voice is a Yogi Bear impression, complete with "Hey boo boo, where's my picnic biscuit?", which he admits is "not really me" but he "couldn't resist". When the table tells him to just use his Billy McConnell voice, he announces, "This is Barry McConnell," and the table debates whether that is spelled B-E-A-R-Y.
Major Baker's Cat proudly points out that, being a cat, he is fully nude, which prompts Drandy to say, "Listen here, Buster, you've got to put some clothes on." The cat later clarifies that he is from "Uranus the planet, not your butthole."
While everyone else is perceiving the black pillar, the cat bends over and starts licking himself.
Glenn introduces himself as a ghoul whose wife died a tragic death many years ago "when I ate her", which the table calls an overshare. The DM tells him he only has a vague recollection of a wife. He later admits he is partial to the pancreas.
Drandy's Divine Sense seems to pick up an undead creature traveling with the group, and he immediately says, "I stab him." It is then pointed out that ghouls are living creatures, so he sensed nothing, though they do eat the dead and the undead.
The cat looks for a doggie door in one of the homes and finds a small Russian man standing in it.
After Drandy threatens to take enemies and fold them up, the table breaks out into a pro-wrestling "Monday, Monday, Monday" chant.
Sheriff Cobb tries to stay stern as the cat charms him and keeps talking. He shakes his head that he is getting too old for this, and finally asks, "Why does this cat keep talking to me?"

Notable Quotes

"My name is Dragon Bee Daddy, fire breather from the north." —Drandy Savage
"I am the shadow of death. I am the grim reaper. If you see me, I'm the last thing you will ever see. They call me Tim." —Tim
"Where's my picnic biscuit?" —Mathon
"I'm a major in the feline battalion of Uranus." —Major Baker's Cat
"My name is Glenn Ghoulia. I'm a ghoul." —Glenn Ghoulia
"Nobody goes up there." —Sheriff Terrick Cobb
"I would advise you get indoors before sundown." —Sheriff Terrick Cobb